Thursday, March 25, 2010

Road Rules

No, not the lame show that's still taking up valuable music video time on (not)MTV.  I’ve seen some things the last couple days while I’ve been driving and thought it a good time for an etiquette update – this one’s for the road so, please . . . take notes:


Rule #1 – when driving you may be in your car, but people can still see you . . . . .this means when you go mining for boogs at a stop-light, everyone sitting around you can see it.  You’re not invisible.  Nor are you working for DeBeers.  There’s no diamonds coming out of there.  Put the finger away slowly and, for Jimminy Christmas’ sake, wash your hands when you get home.


Rule #2 – singing in the shower is ok.  Singing in your car w/ the windows rolled up is still ok, but you risk looking like you have imaginary friends.  Singing loudly in your car with the windows rolled down at a stop light on a warm day?  Bad news bears.  Sorry Mastercard.  The only thing priceless about this is the frightened feeling I get when I think a pack of rabid wounded ducks are attacking the intersection.  Oh, and news flash . . . . .it’s even worse when you have your radio volume at a level only you’re able to hear, but anyone outside of a 5 foot radius can not.  So, listen Lady Gaga, try and tone down the bad romance.  Mouth the words.  Turn your radio up loud enough to drown out your squawking.  Or just don’t sing at all.  The corner of MLK Blvd. and Main Street (because every city has both those) is not the place to warm up your vocal cords for your next American Idol fiasco.


Rule #3 – I’m guilty of the Facebook driving.  Well, let’s say Facebook-stopped-at-a-red-light-driving.  When you can’t keep the car in your lane because your status updating your friends that you just hot-boxed yourself with a giant fart, you need to put the phone down.  And if you are tweeting “driving home to see my baby daddy”, or anything else that nobody else really cares about, you should stop.  You should have twatted before you drove or twit when you get home.

This has been a public service announcement from your friendly mr. overly competitive blogspot.  Stay classy, San Diego.

I win.

mr. overly competitive


UPDATE:  Going to meet up with Re/Max Mrs. tonight to view those town homes from the previous post.  I will let you know if she’s as cuckoo for cocoa puffs as I think she is.

2 comments:

  1. riddle me this....what if you're like a rilllllllllllllly good singer? THEN what?

    my mom once thought this woman was a shitty driver, so she started honking bc the lady was braking, swerving, etc. then she realized the woman was having a seizure in traffic and had to help her....

    a few months ago i was stumbling out of a bar with my friends to walk to the house, when we saw a dude in a porsche parked down the street giving this girl a tonsil cleaning (roadhead)...he had the interior lights on...SHOW OFF...then I screamed, pointed, and ran....

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  2. Then it's ok . . . .I suspect you're not though . . . no offense, but it's usually the ones who think they are that really aren't and proceed to break Rule #2.

    You should blog about that experience and the perils of RH. It's a dangerous game to play.

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